Sean Johnson
Kiss Me Thru the Phone
I wish I could be you
young and innocent
without contempt
faith filled
able to imagine the unseen as real
I wish someone had loved me like I love you
perchance this call would be different
perhaps your letters written
on post it notes and stuck to the fridge instead
of written with the shaky hands
of a child paying penance
I pray to the God of the paper you printed
your first words on
way back in Kinder
I mail my love to you
return the sender
a little something to remind
the saint in my sinner
that we are all wounded yet winners
You are the only one who sees me
with God’s vision
Telephone cords
and wire crossed kisses
are all that keep me tethered to this side of life
I subtracted common sense
and added the divide
that multiplied the sorrow in your eyes
but still you love me
With the blood of your childhood on my hands
I aimed to be the man I never knew
my plan was to give to you
the things that would make your life better
a car, vacations, a horse with four letters
etched in all your uniform blouses
summer, fall and winter houses
I wanted to give you things I had never seen
crack rocks count as cornerstones
when you are building a child’s dream
But even the best played scenes go awry
Your Mommy wasn’t supposed to die
you weren’t supposed to wake to shattered glass
acrid smoke and darkness
I shot
BLAST
screams and masked men swarming past
I shot
BLAST
skull bones splatter
I drop my gun to try and gather
the pieces of what’s left of us
pink pajamas skate on blood
life gone
man down
hands up
but
you still love me
You stand in line
while hours turn to glass
and the sands of time
get blown into macabre sculptures
My butterfly in a room full of vultures
sacrificing Saturdays
in homage to the tattered past
I gave her
Our visiting hours diminishing
like welfare waivers
Still you say
Daddy, it’s never good-bye
You know I’ll see you later
I crucified your life
Yet here sits my begotten savior
With her hand on the glass
her voice, as sweet as my memories of red velvet
lips puckered like blossoming pink petals
she kisses me thru the phone
and it’s this simple gesture that reminds me
history is behind me
the present is here with all her teenage babbling
and though death row has one direction
the future is still worth travelling
From a young age, Sean developed an insatiable love for the written and spoken word and has performed throughout the country. Sean has had art work and poetry published in 29 anthologies worldwide, and in 2014 her poem “Rearview Mirror” was nominated for The Pushcart Prize in Poetry. All My Heroes Were Assassinated is her first full length collection with two of its poems nominated for “Best of the Best” by Edify Fiction and Lunch Ticket, and she was recently nominated for Texas Poet Laureate. In addition to her poetic endeavors, she is also a painter, teacher, rock star auntie, and humanitarian known for her monthly homeless outreach, disaster relief program, and mission work in Africa, Peru, and Central America.